On Saturday I saw Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.

I'm very mixed on how I feel, but to put it simply 1/3 of this movie is pure awesome, that third features Optimus Prime, Megatron, Starscream, Bumblebee, Arcee, and even the main badguy. In short, the majority of Transformers are really cool, with great action scenes, and Frank Welker voices Soundwave!

As for the other two thirds? Pure hatred.

Firstly, I've never sat through a movie and thought 'this should be cut, this shouldn't be so long, this is taking too much time, this was completely unnecessary, this isn't what I paid to see, this is insulting, this is infuriating' so much in a single movie, but I guess when you're a two and a half hours long and only about 45 minutes or less is focussed on the robots themselves, you've got yourself a big problem.

That's right, the wacky like of Sam Witwicky returns to balls up what we loved. Him, his family, and his friends and allies are constantly taking up screen time, every dialogue scene goes on far too long, and yet they're talking so fast you miss most of what they say. His parents return with the idiotic and unfunny slapstick crude humour, including an obsession with cutting to two dogs screwing, that doesn't belong in an action movie, or a war movie, let alone an action war movie starring giant alien transforming robots! Also, the characters come off as morons bumbling their way through the plot, needless scenes are thrown in to show how much they're struggling while at the same time more and more jokes are thrown out.

The worst of this isn't the humans though, it's two Autobots called Mudflap and Skidz. They're two characters inspired by negative black youth steriotypes, with big panels representing ears, big eyes, two crooked loose front teeth, one of which is gold, they dun talk proper, they're constantly bickering, constantly insulting others, constantly chatting in the background, always making out how great they are, and above all, they can't read.

...

Now, I know steriotypes can exist in reality, and there's nothing wrong with a black person having these traits in reality, he would have a right to exist however he likes afterall, but these aren't people, THEY'RE ALIEN ROBOTS! Effectively making them caricatures, constructs of Michael Bay's, or at least someone on the production team, mind. They had to want to make these characters negative steriotypes, just so they could have them in the movie.

Maybe I'm being overly sensetive, I myself am a white Englishman, and seeing as I haven't witnessed anyone else calling foul on this it makes me wonder. But I can't help feeling insulted by the depths this movie goes to to get some cheap laughs.

There's also Wheelie, who for some reason is a decepticon, and a swearing, fire farrting, Joe Pechi impersonator too, who humps legs...

Like I said though, the fight scenes are excellent, the special effects are excellent, and the majority of the Transformers are awesome, just don't expect to be happy inbetween those moments.


In other news, my computer died and is now reborn, though no Photoshop so for now future picture will be coloured by hand, and I still need to get my scanner working. My 360 has dies for the second time. And My job ends on Thursday.

Yep.